I have been working on a video blog of the cochlear implant decision process, and just Micah's day to day life. I really suck at video editing, thank goodness my Brother is learning about film production and editing.. HELP ME RICKEY:)
Micah's signs are emerging!! It is soo exciting, he is signing Mom, eat, more, up, and want. He is also crawling at the speed of light and standing on things, also feeling comfortable enough to let go.
We are still no closer to deciding about the implant ( I am still not closer)! The other week we met up with other families from our ASL class, and one little girl was getting ready to get implanted on the 19th, I found myself apprehensive about it, and feeling sorry for the little girl. I observed my feelings. I believe in her family's choice, but I found myself feeling like, I couldn't do that to Micah. This instinctive protective natural reaction is how I feel about the implant all the time.
Like I have to protect him from it. Protect him from all the hearing people that want him to change and be like them. When he is perfect just as he is!!
I am digging deeper into these feelings and trying to sort it all out.
I had a dream the other night that I packed and took him in the middle of the night, right before his scheduled surgery, I literally ran away from him to protect him from the surgery!
I am praying and praying for some clarity and that God helps me with this decision so that my emotions around the whole thing doesnt effect me knowing deep down what is best for him. I am still reaching out to Deaf people, to get more information. I still have soo many questions!
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